Friend Trouble- Help?
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Please note these are all fake names but use them to clear up confusion. I do not talk about real names and don't speak out if one of the names are yours please.
Alright to begin with one side-
I am friends with a girl, say her name is Betty. She's a new kid. We were playing all together one day outside when Betty said "I think Emily hates me" I told Emily this. When Emily talked to her about it, Betty got mad at me and said it was Emily's group she hated, not Emily. So then Betty told Emily I told her that Emily hated her. So Emily believed Betty and she got upset at me. She started flipping out at me. The problem is Betty is not my friend much and Emily is the top "popular" girl in school. i think Betty used me as a scapegoat to not get herself in trouble although Emily believed her.
Second part-
A girl, lila, and I are talking in the library. She's mad that another girl, Kendra, was showing off a cupcake she made for her friend and when Lila asked for a piece, Kendra said no. So after that, Lila gave me a piece of gum. Kendra asked for some but Lila said no in a mean way. Kendra started telling everyone, including Emily and Betty, about it. I told Lila about it but when she brought it up with Emily, Emily denied it happening. Then Lila went and asked Kendra and Kendra said she had no part in that. So Lila flipped out at me and said she could never trust me again.
I flipped out at her and apparently Lila and Emily were talking about it together so everything I told Lila, Lila texted Emily about it (this happened after school)
So then she ALTERED it to make me look bad at what i said, like that I was flipping out at her for no reason! Then Lila said she didn't "want to be friends with someone she couldn't trust" and I kept saying if you don't want untrustworthy friends, don't be friends with Kendra. She said she trusted Kendra more, and we broke our "bond"
But Kendra's my friend as well so she keeps trying to get me to sit with her, which is where both Betty and Lila sit. But I promised a group of friends, Victoria's group, I'd sit with them. I told them what happened and I'm sitting with them to cool off.
On Thursday I'm gonna try to confront Betty about the issue but I'm waiting for Lila to apologize before I say sorry because she really started it.
What is your opinion?
Alright to begin with one side-
I am friends with a girl, say her name is Betty. She's a new kid. We were playing all together one day outside when Betty said "I think Emily hates me" I told Emily this. When Emily talked to her about it, Betty got mad at me and said it was Emily's group she hated, not Emily. So then Betty told Emily I told her that Emily hated her. So Emily believed Betty and she got upset at me. She started flipping out at me. The problem is Betty is not my friend much and Emily is the top "popular" girl in school. i think Betty used me as a scapegoat to not get herself in trouble although Emily believed her.
Second part-
A girl, lila, and I are talking in the library. She's mad that another girl, Kendra, was showing off a cupcake she made for her friend and when Lila asked for a piece, Kendra said no. So after that, Lila gave me a piece of gum. Kendra asked for some but Lila said no in a mean way. Kendra started telling everyone, including Emily and Betty, about it. I told Lila about it but when she brought it up with Emily, Emily denied it happening. Then Lila went and asked Kendra and Kendra said she had no part in that. So Lila flipped out at me and said she could never trust me again.
I flipped out at her and apparently Lila and Emily were talking about it together so everything I told Lila, Lila texted Emily about it (this happened after school)
So then she ALTERED it to make me look bad at what i said, like that I was flipping out at her for no reason! Then Lila said she didn't "want to be friends with someone she couldn't trust" and I kept saying if you don't want untrustworthy friends, don't be friends with Kendra. She said she trusted Kendra more, and we broke our "bond"
But Kendra's my friend as well so she keeps trying to get me to sit with her, which is where both Betty and Lila sit. But I promised a group of friends, Victoria's group, I'd sit with them. I told them what happened and I'm sitting with them to cool off.
On Thursday I'm gonna try to confront Betty about the issue but I'm waiting for Lila to apologize before I say sorry because she really started it.
What is your opinion?
Nafia (#6416)
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03-28-2012 at 5:07 PM
Today I went and talked to Emily. She wanted time to think about it and talk to Betty, who's been sick recently.<br /> <br /> Lila has been being stuck-up and I don't really want to continue my friendship with her or Betty anymore. I sat with some other friends today instead of them.<br /> <br /> One of Kendra and Lila's friends who I am friends with came and asked me if I was mad at her though.<br /> <br /> Emily has been mad at me though. We sit together in Spanish and she and her friend just swapped seats.<br /> <br /> Lila is a bit of a drama queen, the worst it was was a misunderstanding that she stretched into something worse, I think,
Steaks (#5484)
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03-28-2012 at 4:41 PM
This was a tad hard to understand, it was a bit all over the place.<br /> Regardless, your friends seem to like to pick fights over miniscule things.<br /> Perhaps you can tell them that you find it uncomfortable to constantly get pulled into fights over small things? Also, I would suggest not telling each of your friends when one does something (like giving someone else gum or something), as it seems to just start fights
Honeyb (#29)
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03-27-2012 at 11:45 PM
I'm having a hard time keeping track of who did/said what. Regardless, I agree with Kaitie and Roo.<br /> <br /> Just be yourself. Don't try to be anyone else. Don't try to be friends with someone for some alterior motive. If they can't accept you for who you are, then they're not worth being your friend - especially if they're using you (which it sounds like they are). You are bouncing between friends, trying to mend one reltionship while creating a whole new problem.<br /> <br /> Let it all go. Relax. Be friendly. And if it's brought up, tell your side of the story and say that that's that. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. :)
Roo (#8507)
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03-27-2012 at 10:57 PM
I second what Kaitie said. It sounds like they're getting catty over inconsequential things. I can tell you from personal experience that you'll drive yourself crazy trying to mend bonds that you didn't really break in the first place and walk on eggshells for fear of saying something and setting one of them off. <br /> <br /> If I was in your position, I would approach each person individually and explain what happened and your reasoning behind telling your other friends what you told them. Apologize if you feel the need. If they're still upset with you after all that, try just giving them time to cool off - they may just need some time to realize that they're being petty. If they still won't forgive you, it's their problem - you've already done everything you could. <br /> <br /> Can you tell I spent much of my time in high school bouncing around my circle of friends, trying to mend the relationships they'd broken even though almost none of it was my fault? ;)
~Sundew~ (#46)
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03-27-2012 at 10:46 PM
This all sounds a little crazy over little things. For me, I would just ignore it all personally. Tell my side of the story and if they don't believe me, then that's their problems, not mine. xD<br /> Then again, I don't get into drama or confrontations really.