12-17-2011 at 8:16 AM

meep

12-17-2011 at 7:57 AM

Lifelong Christmas for everyone!

12-17-2011 at 7:50 AM

Locket me babe.

12-17-2011 at 7:36 AM

What happens when it rains cats and dogs ? <br /> <br /> <br /> You can step in a poodle ! <br /> <br /> <br /> xD <br />

12-17-2011 at 7:31 AM

Okie this is a long one...<br /> <br /> A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window, that read: <br /> <br /> "HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer."<br /> <br /> A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined.<br /> <br /> Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager. The office manager looked at the dog and was surprised, to say the least. However, the dog looked determined, so he lead him into the office. Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager.<br /> <br /> The manager said, "I can’t hire you. The sign says you have to be able to type." The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and proceeded to type out a perfect letter. He took out the page and trotted over to the manager and gave it to him, then jumped back on the chair. The manager was stunned, but then told the dog, "The sign says you have to be good with a computer."<br /> <br /> The dog jumped down again and went to the computer. The dog proceeded to demonstrate his expertise with various programs and produced a sample spreadsheet and database and presented them to the manager. By this time the manager was totally dumb-founded! He looked at the dog and said, "I realize that you are a very intelligent dog and have some interesting abilities. However, I *still* can’t give you the job."<br /> <br /> The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign and put his paw on the sentences that told about being an Equal Opportunity Employer. The manager said, "Yes, but the sign *also* says that you have to be bilingual."<br /> <br /> The dog looked at him straight in the face and said, "Meow." <br /> <br />

12-17-2011 at 7:25 AM

Life lessons learned from a dog<br /> <br /> 1. If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you'll get what you want.<br /> 2. Don't go out without ID.<br /> <br /> 3. Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by pissing on their shoes.<br /> <br /> 4. Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.<br /> <br /> 5. Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.<br /> <br /> 6. Always give people a friendly greeting. A cold nose in thebody part is most effective.<br /> <br /> 7. When you do something wrong, always take responsibility (as soon as you're dragged shamefully out from under the bed).<br /> <br /> 8. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss.<br />

12-17-2011 at 7:10 AM

That MLL looks like it's taken up some room... maybe you should put it in my sweet hands and let me care for it deeply

12-17-2011 at 7:08 AM

I want to live forever and umma rip the MLL out of the screen and eat it

12-17-2011 at 7:04 AM

Entering from here as well xD

12-17-2011 at 7:03 AM

Entering =)

12-17-2011 at 6:52 AM

Ravenwolf89 on my side account :D

12-17-2011 at 6:36 AM

I dont know any jokes but I want to enter XD Will enter from my side account too :]

12-17-2011 at 5:57 AM

Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas.<br /> Luke: How do you know?<br /> Darth Vader: I can feel your presents.

12-17-2011 at 5:55 AM

Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?<br /> Brandon: I give up.<br /> Trey: Frostbite.

12-17-2011 at 5:23 AM

*sneaks in and posts here too*

12-17-2011 at 4:37 AM

It's late, I have no jokes, but I really enjoyed reading the ones posted here!!! :D

12-17-2011 at 4:26 AM

Entering from here too.

12-17-2011 at 4:22 AM

Yay for enteringness. Unfortunately, no jokes from me. xD

12-17-2011 at 4:10 AM

Entering on here too xD

12-17-2011 at 4:09 AM

I have no jokes xD. Just entering<br />